Don't Trust Idiots.

Alright.
VF related aside, this is just another idiot on the internet.

This video?
Has comments all over it about how this "babe" is supa sexy.
-_-

Except she's like eight, and ugly.
Anyways.
I have nothing more to say.
I just wanted to post this up here for the laughs.

Bikini Girl

Alright, I've been procrastinating a lot when it comes to writing another entry,
but I promise you, this one girl I'm posting is another source of a good LOL, ROFL, LMAO and PMSL.

So.. yeah,

Say HELLO to... BIKINI GIRL!




Look at how SUPERKAWAIIIDETSU her pic is!
DON'T YOU JUST LOVE HER?
WELL, WE DO.
She's really entertaining.
LULZ.


When I first saw her default pic, I got totally speechless.
The pic itself is not even slutty. Or trashy.
Or kawaii (pfft.).
IT WAS EFFIN' FUGLY.
Way beyond words, but thats okay.
Its like, whatever, so meh.


Let's move on.

On her profile, she stated she is 98.
HOLY CRAP!
I thought she is 10. Maximum 12.
But we could be wrong, or right.
Who knows?
(Shannon still thinks she is 10.)


It is stated on her profile that, "I may look and act like a sweet and inonccent southern girl but am really a punk ass bad girl. "

O' RLY?

Look at her superkawaiiidetsu pic, OH YEAH.
SHE'S ONE HELL OF A PUNK BAD ASS GIRL.
Don't you think so?
She even got full ratings before my partner-in-crime and I decided to mess it up!
So, ha! :P

-_-

OKAY, this is what she wrote on her ABOUT ME section:

"Am Mehgan. Brought to this world I call hell on September 13th. No I will not tell you my age, You will most likey guess it and get it wrong haha :] Well, Am from Florida Jacksonville :] My friends, yeah I said my friends, I wouldnt give them up for the WORLD! I am not in love anymore, and I never was. Am single and looking but I am happy the way I am right now. When I say something I mean it. I say what I mean and I mean What I say and I won't take back anything unless I have no other choice and I will die if I don't.I use proper grammer so if your one of those people who talk using just letters like "u" or "r" I will not talk to you. The letter U is just a letter people, It may sound like the word "you" but it is not. Well, I ride horses, and not the perverted way -.-" Horses are my life I have 12 of them. Well I barrel race it's my pastion, I love doing not for the money that I can win but for the feeling I feel. I live on 10 acers and I love it but there are places I wouldnt care to live to. Well, I will talk to ALMOST everyone, But DO NOT!! send me message/comments saying "wanna cam chat" or "wanna see me naked" cause of course I will say NO. I am not afraid of the word no and I never will be. Yes sometime it may make me mad to be told it cause it's not what i expected and what I wanted to be told but I'll get over it. Well Music is my life, no one will take music away from me. I'd kill anyone if then mis,treat my friends. I will not say my family cause they are not my family anymore.. I'm planing on going into the Military or Army."


To be honest, I don't even know what to think or say when I read that. It is too epically funny, especially the way she dissed the L33T, when she couldn't even spell GRAMMAR at the first place?

"Well, I ride horses, and not the perverted way." - YEAH, WE KNOW!

I think her ABOUT ME concludes every LIKES and DISLIKES that she has, as these two columns are not available on her profile.

(EDIT By Shannon:)

Alright. First off, she can't even say "I am" she just skips straight to the "am". -_- Alright.
And it's like, congrats, no one cares what you renamed the world. wtf. Shut up.
And darn, I was -realllly- hoping I guessed her age right. Too bad. >.> Alright little girl, it's just because you know that you're too young to be using a computer.
"My friends, yeah I said my friends" - Oh boy. She had to clarify that YES, she wasn't lying and YES, she does have friends. -_- Alright. We have a winner.
"I am not in love anymore, and I never was." Well, doesn't "anymore" mean that you were originally? I'm not so sure I understand this statement but, thanks for the heads up any ways.
"Am single and looking but I am happy the way I am right now" Again with no "I". Apparently this girl is just a state of being.
"When I say something I mean it. I say what I mean and I mean What I say and I won't take back anything unless I have no other choice and I will die if I don't." Alright. wtf is all I have to say to that.
Here's the best part - "I use proper grammer." Proper "GRAMMER", guys. o.O Well, at least we know that she doesn't use propper spelling.
" I ride horses, and not the perverted way -.-" " Thanks for the clarification.
"But DO NOT!! send me message/comments saying "wanna cam chat" or "wanna see me naked" cause of course I will say NO." Because with that stunningly gorgeous bikini picture body and that angel of a face, obviously she gets asked to send nudes all the time... >.< "I am not afraid of the word no and I never will be. Yes sometime it may make me mad to be told it cause it's not what i expected and what I wanted to be told but I'll get over it." Again. What in the world does that even mean? -_- Dumbass. "I will not say my family cause they are not my family anymore.. " Ohhh, someone got burneeddd. Poor family. ): Epic sadness. I'll bet they'll miss her... -_- And to top it off, "I'm planing on going into the Military or Army." Congrats, Girl. Are you Army Strong?

This girl was one of our first rants and favorites for the sole being of her ridiculously stupid about me and her disgustingly dorky pictures. She shouldn't be allowed around a computer. Alright. Back to Jade. (:
(/Edit)

And there are journal entries on SOMETHING ABOUT ME thingy that I haven't read, but I'm sure they are boring.


By the way, she deleted most of her retarded pics, but since we are so epic by saving them before they were gone, here are some of the pics that you may like... to laugh at :P

A drawing of her future tattoo that she wants. Two horses in love. Niiice.

OmG li3K i'M sO kAw4!!I!!



The epic pic of a BAD ASS PUNK GIRL. RAWRR!

Note, the one pant leg up and other down. Epic, really.




Another super kawaii pic, with her bra straps falling off her shoulders. SMEXXY.
-_-




"Well, I ride horses, but not in a perverted way.."




SMEXXII, much?

Well, last but not least, another pic of her with a basket of dirty laundry on her back.
Simply epic.
And she's pouting too!!! SEXXXEH!

So yeah.

Whatever it is, that BIKINI PIC shouldn't be her default picture.
And guess what, she CHANGED her default pic, though. But meh, it doesn't matter.
Her current pic still looks retarded!

And for kicks and giggles, we have the actual, original conversation here that we had when we found her:

Shannon: Did you look at the dumb girl?
Shannon: She says she's 98. -_- and she won't tell her real age. but she looks 10. and nasty.
Shannon: wtf.
Shannon: awe, and she has a horse tatt that she drew and wants
Shannon: o.o
jade: is she even real?
jade: -_-
jade: i mean
jade: whoah
Shannon: ?
Shannon: lol
jade: I MEAN
jade: SHE PUT UP A BIKINI PIC
Shannon: lmao
jade: AS A DEFAULT
jade: and its not even sexy
Shannon: ahahahah
jade: slutty is not even a word to describe it
Shannon: ahahaahah
Shannon: disgusting?
Shannon: attrocious?
jade: WOOH
Shannon: hideous?
jade: EXACTLY
jade: FUGLY
Shannon: appalling?
Shannon: eye-burning?!
jade: EPICALLY FUGKY
Shannon: lmfao.
[10:22] ichbinjade: *FUGLY
Shannon: COMMENT THAT
Shannon: ahahahh
Shannon: She got a few comments calling it sexy..
jade: SHE EVEN GOT FULL RATINGS!
Shannon: LMFAO
Shannon: wtf
Shannon: we need to fix that
jade: lets screw her ratings lol
Shannon: o.o
Shannon: ahahaha
Shannon: I love us.
jade: I COMPLETELY REJECT HER
jade: she shouldnt be on VF
Shannon: ahahah
Shannon: she shouldn't be on earth. -_-
jade: she should be in the HAY with the horses
Shannon: lmfao
Shannon: I GAVE HER A 1
Shannon: woo
jade: i did it!
jade: I GAVE HER A 1 too!
jade: because her bikini pic is so fuckin epic
Shannon: YAY
Shannon: rofl
Shannon: lmfao
Shannon: I can't stop laughing.
Shannon: rofl. and she tries to act all cool by dissin' the l33ts too
Shannon: ahaha
jade: 8.80
132 points / 15 people
jade: HAHAHAHAHAHAAH
jade: we killed her ratings!
Shannon: ahahahaahha
Shannon: Well, I ride horses, and not the perverted way -.-"
jade: WE ARE EPIC!
Shannon: we are.
jade: lol
Shannon: " "wanna see me naked" cause of course I will say NO."
Shannon: ... I'm sure she gets that all the time. -___-
jade: she must be kidding when she typed this.. -_-
jade: I live with my Brother, Mother, Step Father, and my Step Brother but I also have two Step Sisters :] I use proper grammer so if your one of those people who talk using just letters like "u" or "r" I will not talk to you :] The letter U is just a letter people, It may sound like the word "you" but it is not.
Jade: GRAMMER FTW
Shannon: LMFAO.
Shannon: I HATE THOSE DUMB PEOPLE
Shannon: GQHHHHAAHWROI:E
Shannon: GAH
Shannon: I'M GOING TO SHOOT THEM ALL
Shannon: I HATE RETARDS WHO TRY TO DISS OTHERS, BUT ARE RETARDED THEMSELVES
jade: HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH
Shannon: AND CAN'T EVEN SPELL FKN GRAMMAR RIGHT
jade: I KNOW RIIIIIIGHT?
Shannon: o.o
Shannon: she deserves a -10938729847324897
Shannon: too bad fuckin' vf only has 1.
Shannon: -___________-
jade: yeah
jade: i wish we can give her a negative!
Shannon: that would be great.
Shannon: ahaha.
Shannon: but with the site full of emos,
jade: HAHAHAHAA
Shannon: I bet it would be a liability
Shannon: for vf
Shannon: to have negatives
Shannon: probably too many suicides would result from it
Shannon: -_-
jade: LOLZ
Shannon: "I am not afraid of the word no and I never will be. Yes sometime it may make me made to be told no but I get over it"
Shannon: lmfao. wtf.
jade: lol whats that suppose to mean?
Shannon: "Well Music is my life, no one will take music away from me :]]" -grabs music and runs- PWNED!
jade: HAH
jade: LiEK OMAIGAWD KAWAIIIIII
jade: ----was a link to a picture ----
jade: HAHAAHAHAH
jade: honestly... -_-
jade: a peace sign?
Shannon: lmfao
Shannon: that made me lolz
Shannon: forrreal.
Shannon: I am telling you she's ten.
Shannon: that's what you do
Shannon: when you're ten
Shannon: but she says she's 98
Shannon: so whatever.
jade: LOL
jade: 98 and still so KAWAIIII? liek omg!
Shannon: and someone seriously told her she was sexy
Shannon: o.o
jade: whats her secret?
Shannon: ahahah
Shannon: sorry
Shannon: I lied
Shannon: "smexi"
Shannon: and "cute!"
Shannon: just kidding, not cute
Shannon: it was nice
Shannon: @_@
Shannon: I just want to comment her and be like
Shannon: WHY ARE YOU ALIVE?
jade: LOLZ
jade: honestly
jade: even her default pic will give me a nightmare
jade: -shudders-
Shannon: ahaahah
Shannon: aren't those supposee to be like
Shannon: the prettiest picture?
Shannon: >.<>.> I don't know if I could do it.
Shannon: rofl.
Shannon: she looks
Shannon: like she's on some sort of
Shannon: muscle killing drug or something
jade: LOL
Shannon: like she can't control her face.
Shannon: x.x
jade: gawd -_-
jade: whats with the pic.. and her bra straps falling off her shoulders?
Shannon: ITZ SEXii oK?!
jade: -blinds-
Shannon: ahahahha
jade: thats right
jade: IVE DECIDED TO GO BLIND
jade: LMAO
Shannon: lmfao
Shannon: I can't stop laughing
jade: LOL
jade: HAHAHAHAHAHA
jade: i cant stop laughing either
jade: damns you
Shannon: we are so 3pic.
Shannon: and mean.
Shannon: we're so very very mean.
Shannon: lmfao.
(And this is where the part of the conversation turned in to the idea for a blog:)
jade: OH YES
jade: we should like
jade: take screenshots
jade: and post them on blogspot or something
jade: and write nasty entries abt everything
Shannon: lmfao.
Shannon: ahahahah
jade: and remain anonymous!
Shannon: I'm tellin' you. If only we could hit you tube. We'd be big.
Shannon: rofl.
Shannon: remain anonymous. yes!
jade: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Shannon: woo! for anonomynity!
Shannon: AND GRAMMER.
Shannon: LOLZ.
jade: AND VERGINATY!
Shannon: lmfao.
jade: AND SMERNOFF
Shannon: YAYY
jade: whoah
Shannon: ?
jade: this feels like a big mission hahaah
Shannon: ahah what?
jade: hahaahah
jade: i mean, if we can really be like the NASTY DUO of VF
jade: WHOAH
Shannon: that would be amazing
Shannon: rofl
Shannon: and 3p1c
jade: we'll be doing such a big favor to the world!
Shannon: ahahaha
jade: GETTING RID OF RETARDS
Shannon: lmfao.
Shannon: But yeah, so at my school,
Shannon: they had quotes painted on the walls
Shannon: Like "carpe diem"
Shannon: or there was one like, "if you lose, at least make the guy in front of you break the record" or something
Shannon: and under it,
Shannon: it had anonymous
Shannon: or whatever for whoever said it
Shannon: except
Shannon: the people who painted it on the wall
Shannon: spelt anonymous
Shannon: anonyomous.
Shannon: lmfao.
Shannon: It was the kids in our leadership class. -___-
jade: lol
Shannon: Like, I was reading it
Shannon: and I was like
Shannon: wtf
Shannon: they spelt anonymous wrong?
Shannon: and they painted it on the wall
Shannon: of a school
Shannon: what morons
Shannon: @___@
jade: HAHAHAAHHAAHAHAH
Shannon: I hate people.
Shannon: >.>

Have fun LOL-ing!

Teddi, ... banana.... tranny... something or other.

Prepare yourself for this one.


This one, was originally an idiot because of her pictures, yes. However, before we started saving photos of these morons, she took down the winner.

Let me explain.

When we first came upon this... Whatever,

(We haven't decided between calling her "Tedii, Banana, or tranny" really)

It was because of her default picture.

This brilliant picture was her making some nasty face,
(like she was choking on a bug)


while wearing nothing but a pair of underwear.


She was covering her chest with a teddy bear,
(and mind you this was a full body shot.)

It was miserable and obviously one for the blog of the epically ugly.

However,
She removed the picture right before we created this blog. -_-
Thus, we must use her other idiotic pictures.
And trust me, there were plenty to choose from.


First,
we have a screen shot of her miserable, eye soar of a page:

















Yes. She has lovely glitters and blinkies and things strewn across her page.
And unfortunately, yes, she is eating her necklace.

Do the parents not feed this poor child?


Alright. She doesn't have a whole lot of information on her, other than that stupid list of things she enjoys, so
on to the "gallery" of Epically Ugly photos.




Okay. So maybe you understand now, why one of her possible nicknames included banana (with Jaundice). Because, well, in this infamous picture she is decked out in her lovely, yellow attire.
And why Jaundice you might ask?
Well because her tights give her legs a wonderful, healthy glow of of greenish yellow of course!
DUH, lulz.

Oh,
and someone please explain to me,
why every one thinks that that face where it looks like your lips are being pulled off is attractive?
Because it's not.
But all of these girls still seem to try and pull it off.

Also,
if any of you were worried you wouldn't see colored tights again,
it's alright. You can calm down.
Plenty more where that came from.



Explain to me what face this is supposed to be?



This one? I just don't even know. -_- Some of these pictures really just speak for themselves.



Alas! More colored tights.
And she even pulls it off with a lovely, hard core, brass knuckle belt buckle. Fantastic ain't it?
Additionally, she has matching make up for her wonderful tights.
Fantastic.
At least she knows her colors. I'm so proud of her.



OH! It's a GHOST!
... With blue legs? How odd...



This one's just stupid and ugly.
And why would anyone want their hair to look like it got ran over with a lawn mower?
Because I have this strange, unearthly feeling, that that's the look she was going for...



Again with the eating of random objects!
Jesus, someone get this girl a donut or something.
I bet hats don't taste very good.



Really?
Was this neccesary?
Can you get any more trashy?



Oh wait. You can get more trashy!
This was the next best thing after she deleted her naked picture.
I really loved the comment that someone left on it too. It was epic.
"I really like your tattoo."
You mean the one that's a script running below her jeans? The one you can't even read? -_-
Yah,
we know where you were lookin' bud.
Again with the disgusting hair and stupid faces.
Don't people usually take pictures so they look nice?

NOTE: Jade thinks this girl's just flat all over... (hair... chest...)



And since I know that you all missed it so much,
more fantastically colored tights.
Really,
I wish I could be a part of the rainbow too.






-_-
So that concludes our entry on, the teddi, tranny, banana thing.
I don't know.
Maybe she's all of them. A man-girl who dresses up as a banana and uses teddy bears for bras?
Whatever.





She's still a failure when it comes to our standards,
just for being such an ugly skank. -_-

SO!

A premium member decided to drop me a bomb and messing around with my perfect rating.
For the LULZ of it, I think that fella is jealous.
Because I attract little girls pretty much all the time.
-_-

What a sad, pitiful case.

BY THE WAY,


I'm not really bothered by it, but since this whole bomb dropping thingy can get me suspended, OH YEAH I AM KINDA PISSED.
I wonder what my epic wifeh will have to say about this?

-_-

Honestly, can someone please tell me what should I do now?
I speak only ENGLISH, and a little GERMAN.
PORTUGESE is never my expertise.
I mean, why bother chatting with someone who posted 'PLEASE SEND A COMMENT TO ME IN ENGLISH' on the profile?
It doesn't make any sense, really.

Well, at least she's 15, so its not as horrible as being harassed by a 13 yr old!

Squirrel Stew.

Alright.
I know that this entry is straying from our purpose of outing 13 year old idiots that reek the web, but it is still just as ridiculously stupid so we decided it was worthy of an entry.

My mom pulled out her box of memorabilia and one thing was a book of poems that an ex boyfriend wrote for her.
They were in their 20's.
He told her that he spent months and months on this, hard at work,
and although it was a cute idea,

it was definitely a gift where "it's the thought that counts."
The writing is miserably corny and the thoughts half the time stray.

In this book of love poems, he somehow manages to find beauty in eating squirrels - I guess relating that to my mom? I don't know. But none the less, this poem was in there.
(Among an Ode to their dog, and how it has flees.)

For your laughter and pleasure,
"Squirrel Stew".


I eat squirrel stew
And chew
On lead
He's dead

I live
can you believe he dies
That I may live?
He's good
I Only hope I am
As tasty to a bear Or
Some other carnivore

It only fits
It's only right

That we live our life
We fight our fight
And in the end
We die, we bend
To a greater will than ours
We die and go on.





Annnnnnd some pictures of the book:



The book.



The man with his banjo.
Yes, he played banjo.
And no, Jade, he's not 13. He's in his twenties. This writing is inexcusable once you're passed puberty.
Also, part of the letter that he wrote explaining how this project took him months. -_-



This is their dog, and the poem about it...



And if you didn't really believe that this poem was real,
well.
here it is.









So, here you have it.
After a walk down memory lane,
we have a complete and epic fail.

Fellas,
if you want to win a girl over - take this note, and don't write her a poem about how you enjoy eating squirrels.

"The Broken Doll."

Alright.
So here we have,
exibit A.


We've named her - the broken doll.

And here is what her "About Me" says:
"Profile: umm hi.. ok these are the facts : im 5ft 3/4, im nice and social, i always reply, i always accept adds except if your like a fag or something,i love singing and hanging... just add me and get to know me .. dont be shy... dont add me if your a pervert i'll just delete you simple =D"

-__-
Note, that listed underneath her "likes" column, she has "writing" and "poetry" pointed out as some of her favorites.

Oh dear,
God only knows what her writing sounds like if that's how she articulated herself in her profile.

And don't you love that she adds everyone,
.... except fags.

Oh no?
Is she going to catch their gayness?! o:

Ahh well.

They probably don't want to add her anyways.
No one, not even a little gay boy, likes to play with broken dolls.





It's funny how she resembles Chucky, from the horror movies.

I don't even know what to say about this one. o.o

Again. It speaks for itself.



AHHH. A ZOMBIE ATTACKED HER.



OH NOZ. THERE'S A SPIDER ON HER FACE!
Oh wait. That's just her eye.



Awkward?


And the most epic fail:



She edited the picture, so that she painted on her eyeliner and lashes, as well as glazing over her eye so it looks like her irisises are bleeding tears, or something.
This is an example on how NOT to edit a picture, because the editing does not work in ones favor what so ever.


Under dislikes, she has listed "wannabes,"
although to me, it seems as if she is a wannabe herself.
I bet she wishes she had pH0T0$h0p sKiiLz. lulz.

Unfortunately, she does not have much written in her about me and she does not keep a journal on the site,
so this is bout all we have on her,
regardless,

she's still pretty stupid.

Introductions.

As for the first order of business,
we thought we'd introduce ourselves.

To begin with,
We're two people - Shannon and Jade,
from two opposite ends of the world,
who made this for the lulz.


We met on Vampire Freaks, which is basically a cess pool for creeps, weirdos, and idiodic morons. Hence, our relationship was formed off of bitching and bitching and some more bitching about the nasty, stupid people who tried to befriend and talk to us.



And then,
this project was born.
Again, remember, this is only for jokes. And you all know that everything we say in here is true. >.<
But besides that,
we want to let you know - we don't make fun, soley based on looks,
but if the person's an idiot and they're ugly,
making fun of the looks just happens to be part of the package.



So enjoy what we provide,
because we've definitely had a lot of lols, lulz, rofls, and lmfaos with these.

---


And here's the future story of Shannon and Jade:


We are going to take over the world.

THAT'S right.

We're going to be an epic couple, that people dress up as for Halloween,
(instead of Romeo and Juliet, or whatever.)
Hello Kitty boxers are a must. Along with snakebites, cool sunglasses, band tshirts, and amazing shoes.

We're going to start our own Youtube channel,where we pick on all of the idiots of VF.
(Watch out! You'll probably be next.) - Scratch that. We went for a blog instead!
And just bitch.
And we'll get so famous for no reason - and I bet you'll all leave us lovely hate mail comments that we'll laugh at,use in our next video,and then just end up making us more famous. ;D
After we're famous,
we'll start our own clothing line - with lame shirts, but they'll be epic, and everyone will buy them anyways - just because it's us who made/sold them.

After we make a ton of money from that,
we'll use it to start our own label where we become a famous "band", except we'll suck so bad,
but because of electronics and editing,we'll sound okay - just like the rest of today's talentless popstars. (:

And,
obviously,
that's not it for the 3pic4lly l33t duo.
There's more to come. ;D

Stay tuned!


---




We'll have some of our epically ugly morons up soon enough.
Be patient.